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AMAZING VIDEOS

This video is worth watching not only because it’s amazing but also because it is so clearly the result of an absolutely mind destroying amount of work

Nobody Beats The Drum – Grindin’ from nobody beats the drum on Vimeo.

They even made a joke video about how painful it was

the making of Grindin’ from nobody beats the drum on Vimeo.

this new OK go video is amazing too. I know you’re going to shout COG at me (or ‘The Way Things Go’ if you’re that way inclined) but the detail really makes this special. Check out how the ‘machine’ (their description, not mine) is playing with the band in time. Awesome.

Have a sneak peak at a work in progress…

Those of you who pay attention may know my partner Nell works at the Women’s Library in Whitechapel.  Before you ask, Men ARE allowed in!  It is in fact a library of women’s history rather than a library for women’s use only.  It was here I saw the banners used on suffragette marches which sparked in my imagination last summer when producing the artwork for The Cribs’ Ignore The Ignorant.

I made these banners with Nell, and then shot them in the areas around Brick Lane and Spitalfields.  Now me and Nell are making a new banner for the Library itself.

Nell’s skill with a needle puts me to shame and I enjoy being obsessively neat and methodical (give me anything with a system) so I prepare the type.  Here’s a sneak look at the project before Nell goes to work on the lettering.

Eagled eyed people out there will spot that I’ve used Swiss921 as a starting point for the type.  It’s a labour intensive process, with the cutting and pinning of letters being only half the job.  The end product is always satisfactory though.  Its so weighty and tactile.

How to know your local pub hates you

Its in the little things they write.

nothing beats a massive head on a tiny, strangely shaped body

Magazine covers and adverts are clearly mental. They are designed to grab your attention in a split second, but rarely stand up well to close scrutiny. That’s fine if you are aware this is what they are doing, but if you begin to let them influence your world view you’re in trouble. Take, for example, this advert that I’ve pilfered from the glorious Photoshop Disasters blog. Brasil’s popular brand M Officer, has ridiculous ideas of what a woman looks like

It’s impossible to ignore how unrealistic this image is isn’t it?  Yet how people end up with strange figures like this in adverts is pretty obvious.  Imagine the list of demands from the client; Eye contact is a must to suck you in, they also want you to see the cut of the dress which is why her back is to you.  It goes without saying you should make it sexy, which is why they’ve painted on under boobs and had hands hitching up the hem, and they want you to think its slimming so they’ve made her head bigger and her arms long and her waist non existent.  This is clearly batshit crazy but also in commercial terms, totally logical.  Many people clearly like feeling sexy and thin.  So how many parts of this photo is cropped together?  Well I’ve quickly marked up a shot so you can see where I would imagine the main areas of composite are

And that’s just the start of it.  in fact I forgot to add a line to indicate the entire cutout on the ribcage too.  Then there would be literally hundreds of layers of work on this sho.  This is nothing new though, and it’s a skill that precedes Photoshop.  Check out this shot of Grace Jones by Jean Paul Goude

This iconic pose is immediately striking but also impossible, and actually the result of creative compositing

This Grace Jones project is clearly fantastic, and the airbrushing is flawless.  But so few examples of modern photoshopping comes anywhere close.  I find it frustrating that people seem to suspend disbelief when viewing modern composites and judge them as if they are intended to be realistic examples of humanity.  Clearly they’re not realistic at all!  They are complex pictorial stories that are told in a blip.

Look at this image from http://www.exploratorium.edu

can you tell the difference between the two shots?

If you scroll down you’ll see below

Clearly our ability to see distortions in images is far less astute compared to our skill at spotting bad CGI in moving image.  Perhaps this inability is the reason that fashion and advertising photography is so problematic.

This week I saw another laugh out loud example of a photoshop disaster, which is being discussed at length on the internet

people can tell this photo is clearly nonsense but what part of it do you think is drawing the focus of peoples ire?  The armpit!  Hillarious no?  clearly there are bigger points at play.  Like for example the head spiced on to the body?  I’m going to hazard a guess that the original face was angled more like this

but the more I look the more lines of cropping I see.  The hair is massive, the face is stupid.  The outline has no relation to the body within it.  The flesh is a drawing, the corset has been squeezed in and then the whole thing is coated in a sheen of gloss.

and all people have to complain about is the armpit?

any ideas who I can get cheap gas from?

I inadvertently found myself on the Evening Standard site today. Now I do understand the fact they rely on advertising to support their paper, but isn’t this a bit much?

Not only was I greated by a full page spread for British Gas before I saw any content (no screen grab I’m afraid) but the company seem to have bought all the real estate on the site. I’m not against that completely (I’m just glad they can’t play Blur to me any more than they already do on TV) but isn’t it ridiculously cheap/lazy to then just stick the different variations of their banner ads in multiple places on the same page? Couldn’t they have performed some attempt at joined up thinking? This is the ‘Information Superhighway’ isn’t it? If you bought a full page ad in the print edition, you wouldn’t just stick four identical quarter page spreads on it would you?

Sometimes it feels like no matter what I say, no one is listening

Check out Winston. He’s struggling to find his voice in the crowd.

Winston’s owner is behind the brilliant fourfour blog where you can never find a signal.

I had a very nice thing happen yesterday

My good friend (and ex housemate) Dan gave me a life back home from Leeds to Hackney.  He totally dropped a awesome surprise on me by lending me his 1210!

I had been talking to him about the state of my turntable and putting the club world to right when he had casually mentioned lending me his as he didn’t have space in his place for it at the moment.  It was one of those ‘that would be super-cool’ offers that are just too damn generous for it to actually happen.  It just wouldn’t be right would it?  Its just too damn awesome.

Well the next day he picked me up in his car and as I put my bag in his boot I was like BLAMMO!  He meant it!  So I’m currently working my way through all my records again and being pulled back through memory lane.  What kind of memories you say?  How about this one:

and what was I playing on?

See?  battered and well loved 1210s were always there. and totally loveable in a way a Numark never could be.  Now I’m working my way through a stash of sevens bought from Jumbo Records and my love affair is back on track.  I don’t think I’ve listened to so many songs to the end in a long time.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean to sound like a Luddite, I just really love playing records.

* * * STOP THE PRESS * * *

Turns out this

is a 1200 (I feel so foolish for such a schoolboy error).  We can thank Walker for that, but his knowledge is understandable seeing as he had such a good vantage point at the time

Thanks Walker!

Does anyone want to pay me for this album sleeve?

Just imagine the instant ubiquity you would gain thanks to the iconic nature of this cover. I’m sure it would help you profile considerably. Seriously though, someone must have done this by now? If not, why not?

guess where this is from

Answer after the jump!

(Continued)

Sorry if you’re squeamish

…but this is too damn good to ignore.